For His Glory

Ok so now a serious blog. This one is just to praise God for what He's being doing in my life even when I don't deserve it. For a while, actually for over a year, I've been in an imaginary valley. I say imaginary because I didn't have any logical reason to be there...I had a loving supportive family, a ton of friends, a guy I was head over heels for, and I had just gotten accepted into law school. I felt blessed beyond belief.

I guess what triggered it was leaving the life I loved so much in Clemson behind and starting over in a very scary place, leaving behind a town I adored, all the friends I had grown so close to and the guy I knew without a doubt I was supposed to be with. So deeper and deeper I sunk under this invisible weight. I have never been an unhappy person so I couldnt understand what was happening to me. Nothing made me happy anymore and no matter how hard I tried I couldn't make myself see the bright side. I quit talking to God because I just didn't know what to say and He felt like a stranger to me. I took all my pain out on the person I loved the most and he loved me enough to stay faithful despite the toll it was taking on him. In the end though, it did its damage and we were over.

I kept my struggles from my family for a year when finally I couldnt hide it anymore. I did things to hurt myself, but they ended up hurting the ones I love even more. My lowest point was seeing the pain I caused in the tears of my family members as they all sat around me trying to comfort me but feeling helpless.

I tell all this even though it's very personal because I want it to glorify God. I turned my back on God for a year and yet He still remained faithful. He got me out of a valley when I was ready to throw in the towel and give up. He mended my heart and he mended my relationships with ones I had hurt. He healed me like no medicine could. His promises are all true; He will never leave you. Today I can praise God for the blessings in my life and I can say that I'm happy.

I can't tell you what happened to change things. I don't really know. One day it just felt like God lifted the burdens that had been weighing me down and told me He would carry them for me. And He has. And I know that if for some reason I lose my way again, He will still be there, waiting patiently for my return. In the meantime, I will wait patiently for His. :)